YOU Made This Personal
by P.F. Jones
Dear Mr. President:
You and I have had our disagreements in the past.
Take last Summer, for example, when my oil company had a little spill in the Gulf of Mexico.
You seemed to think we weren't cleaning it up fast enough.
I disagreed, but still thought you had a fair, arguable point.
You had every right to take your case to the American public.
You could even use your federal agencies to fine and repremand us.
But you took it upon yourself to assassinate three of my JP executives.
That was crossing a line.
You don't want to cross me.
Ask Eliot Spitzer or Rupert Murdoch.
And by killing Ryan Hosier, who you knew was my personal protegé, you made it personal.
Fine.
You want to get personal?
So be it.
You may want to talk to your wife, Michelle.
She's been naughty!
We had a couple of rendezvous while she was attending the FIFA World Cup in Germany.
She was quite a flexible diplomat skilled in foreign tongues.
Long story short, I wanted her, and she was down to party.
I gotta tell you, I've had models, movie stars, congresswomen, queens and empresses, but none of them could move like Michelle.
And none of them were as nasty!
That woman's a freak!
But I don't have to tell you.
Particularly when I could show you.
Go ahead, Barack, click on the video link.
I dare you.
Then imagine waking up to find you're no longer President, or worse, your girls were never even born.
Don't test me.
I have my ways.
I strongly suggest you reconsider ever interfering with any of my businesses again.
Good day.
