IJI Apolo- DAMMIT! DID WE MAKE ZOMBIES?!

by Conner Banks
Post Manhattan Reporter
October 30, 2010

International Jones, Inc., our parent company, announced Monday that-
Goddammit!
Did they make fucking zombies?!
What the fuck is IJI's problem?
Have they no decency?
Or at least common sense?
Apparently this was a joint-fuckup by subsidiaries Integrated Technologies and PharmaJones.
There's a fucking surprise.
The same duo that brought us vampires and Super-AIDS is at it again.
It says here that an experiment with a new longevity drug went awry-
Imagine that!
So now we've got freakin' undead.
Thanks, IJI!
And do they eat brains?
Of course they do!
Are they loose?
You know it!
Multiplying?
You betcha!
Fuck this-
I'm going to get a shotgun.
 


 
 
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