Melinda Richardson, a TSA agent at O'hare International Airport, announced Monday that she wished for someone to grope her, regardless of whether or not they were looking for anything.
"It's been so long since I've felt a man's touch," said Richardson, "that I've forgotten what it feels like."
Richardson feels steeped in irony as she pats down hundreds of airline passengers each day who don't want it.
"They take for granted what it's like to have someone run their fingers down your back or up your inner thigh." she said.
Richardson said she wished the passengers could frisk her.
"If they caressed my chest, they'd feel a loving heart," she said.
Richardson said she's no longer particular about the gender of her next potential lover.
"I'd see a woman, so long as she wrapped her body completely around mine."
Richardson hopes to be used sexually soon, as it's starting to affect her work performance.
"I've been repremanded for lingering fingers," she said, "often while burying my face in the back of someone's hair and inhaling deeply. Jesus, I need to get laid."