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What's Wrong with This Employee Training Video?
 
More and more Americans are picking up a second (or third) job in the service industry to help make ends meet. Their elation at being hired is often dashed when they're subjected to the company's orientation video, for a variety of reasons:
 
It keeps saying disparaging things about "Chinamen."
It informs you that employees may not use pagers, Discmans, Palm Pilots or Gameboys while on the clock.
It seems to be probing as to whether or not you would be willing to help kill the boss's wife.
It oddly keeps mentioning that employees make the best thieves.
It includes frighteningly specific sexual harrassment scenarios involving Janet the attractive cashier.
It keeps subtly implying what happened to the last union organizer that worked there.
It specifically forbids copying a customer's credit card information, stealing their identity, flying to Reno and buying a mobile home for a prostitute.
It explains why security has the right to search all purses, bags, coats, bras, crotches and anal cavities of workers before leaving the building.
It explains why you shouldn't get involved if a customer's child goes missing.
It spends 24 minutes explaining why you're not worth giving health insurance.
It has already asked three times if you really want this job.

EJ

TB

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