Donald Trump Warns Public About
'Ted Cruz's Suicide Bombers'
|by Henry Ubanks
Post Washington Reporter
February 8, 2016
|Presidential candidate Donald Trump announced Saturday that he would be increasing security at his campaign events due to threats of "Ted Cruz's suicide bombers."
"Look, it's the sad state of affairs when I have to worry about Cruz sending Cuban terrorists to my rallies, or so I'm told," said Trump.
When asked who had told him such things, Trump became cagy.
"I'm not going to name my sources," said Trump, "because that might put their lives in danger, working deep from within the Cruz crime cartel."
Trump remained adamant while offering little-to-no evidence.
"Alls I know is that Senator Cruz is smuggling Cuban terrorists in so they can strap a bomb to their chest and kill hard-working, real Americans who come out to support me. It's horrible."
"Furthermore, from what I understand, the last 428 people to shake the senator's hand at rallies have gotten chlamydia. I mean, where does it stop?"
Senator Cruz was somewhat caught offguard when reached for comment.
"Wha- Is he really allowed to just say anything? Really?"