My Dearest Verna,
I've commendered these colomn inches from the paper to publicly proclaim my undying love for you, as well as apologize for my behavior this weekend.
Without you, I wouldn't have any reason get up in the morning.
To show how much you mean to me, I'm gonna take you out for a night on the town.
I just need to scrape together a few more bucks before I can do it.
Between my payments on Betsy (RIP) and the new truck, I'm pretty strapped for cash 'til payday.
But I do have a ten-dollar gift card for Cracker Barrel.
I know that's your favorite.
I've also got a pre-paid Visa from Walmart with about $6.50 left on it.
If I can get eight or nine more bucks, we should have enough for a meal.
(just remember to get water with a lemon, like you like to)
If I get ten bucks I might even leave a tip myself.
Then we can go for a walk on the beach and I'll rub your sandy feet.
I might even kiss your starfish, if you know what I mean.
I just hope you'll forgive me for that compromising position you found me in.
Just know that I was thinking about you.
Your sister's facebook profile being up was a complete coincidence.
So get ready for the most romantic night of your life, Sweet Pea.