Freshman's New Dormmate Seems
to Think He's Masterbating Silently

cbby Steve Floyd
Post Kent Reporter
September 5, 2012

A freshman at Kent State University has come to the conclusion that his new roommate must think he's masterbating silently each night in the top bunk.
"It's really disturbing," said Joshua Troyer, 18, "I can hear him breathing hard and the whole bunk shakes. I just lie still and wait for it to end abruptly."
Troyer said he and William Sallier, 18, were assigned to the same dorm room in Allen Hall, but he's already considering a room transfer.
"How can he not know I hear him? Does he enjoy me listening?" pondered Troyer.
He's also concerned about Sallier using his computer.
"William doesn't have a laptop, so I said he could use mine. But then I found a bunch of porn on it- and not normal stuff," said Troyer.
Between Sallier's troubling browser history and his borrowing conditioner every time he goes to the shower, Troyer said he's having dificulty focusing on his studies.
"Last night I woke up to find him staring at me from the top bunk," said Troyer, "How am I supposed to sleep after that?"


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