Enjoying Yet Another Year of No-Bid American Military Contracts !

At our headquarters in Hapsburg, Virginia, we take pride in developing not only weapons and defense systems to protect our brave men and women in Iraq and Afganhistan, but also weapons for the wars of tomorrow, and beyond.
Our stockholders know that when Congress needs something done right, "Integrated Technologies" is one of the first names on their mind.
The only way we could get more no-bid contracts was if we had our own president in the White House with generations of vested family interest in the corporation- wait, did that.

We Say 'Tomato,'
They Say 'War Profiteering'

Let's be honest, war is profitable. And we are here to serve our government.
Since the government tends to pay for our services up front, we always make our profit.
If, by some rare chance, some of our products and services fall through the cracks, the American public can rest assured that it's not intentional. Neither Integrated Technologies, nor Jones Petroleum or its subsidiary, Contracted Mercenaries, Inc., ever mean to price gouge, short or commit fraud against the American military.

it home

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